Stepped onto the scale today for the first time in awhile and I was a meager 282 lbs. That's right 282 lbs---if I fell asleep on the beach right now Greenpeace would probably try to put me back in the water as part of their "save the whales" campaign. That is 70 lbs. heavier than when we got married. Since the age of 17 I've always been able to benchpress more than my weight, I can still do that but the margin for error is (forgive the pun) slim. Two culprits currently thrive in my life that forbid me from a healthy weight and they both start with "p." Pop and Polish doughnuts, or as I like to call them "manna from Heaven"---translated into Polish "manna z nieba." How do I let go of two things that bring me so much joy? The answer is a contest with, my nemesis and Christian brother, Matt Jones. The Jones family and ours were in the same missionary candidate class with Baptist World Mission. I still remember our first session when Dr. Cummins said "raising support is not a contest"---Matt and I looked eachother in the eye and the race to the field was on. There has been heated debate as to which family won that contest, sure they got to the field first but we had to raise more money. That debate won't be settled until Heaven, where Matt will finally come to the realization that he did in fact lose.
So how can I achieve vindication in the here and now? The answer is through a "Missionary Biggest Loser" contest with Matt Jones. Like me, he enjoys the taste of fine cuisine. I believe two of his closest friends are in fact "Swiss Miss" and "Little Debbie." So we are going to battle it out over the next three months on our blogs. Updating you each Saturday on the victories and horrible defeats of the past week. The winner is to be decided June 21 and the criteria will be based solely on "overall percentage of weight lost." You can check out my nemesis and Christian brother's progress here. Don't forget to check back each Saturday as to our progress and mental state. In addition, I will still be updating our blog during the week with ministry and family news.
March 22/Day 1: 282 lbs.
Mental State: I really want a doughnut, could one more really hurt?
9 comments:
Sounds like a great contest for the 2 of you. So...what's the prize for the winner?
All right, I've posted. Let the weight loss begin . . . uh, well, right after our big Easter lunch that is.
I read you blog entry Matt. Great blog---but I hope you accidentally eat some egg this week. Oh, and I'm praying for your family.
Mom Hayes,
I don't think the prize should be anything too big. Maybe just the title CHAMPION OF THE WORLD!!!!
pitiful just pitiful....why not chinese buffet your body and add a diet coke.....
Hey man, I'm gonna have to root for matt jones and I'll be so kind as to explain why. Ever since I was 7 or 8 years old, I've been bigger than you. Remember I used to give you my clothes when I outgrew them. I'm starting to enjoy this 'little brother' thing, and there's no way I'll take back the 'big brother' monicker.
"There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and that he should make his soul enjoy good in his labour...Go thy way, eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with a merry heart; for God now accepteth thy works." - Ecclesiastes
Be big or be skinny, just be happy bro...
Josh,
You are rooting against me? That's treason, I guess I can send you some of my clothes now.
Buena idea, Jason.
We will be following your shrinking success or your bloating failures.
Dave and Kristi,
Hopefully you'll witness the former rather than the latter. Either way, it should be fun and slightly humiliating.
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